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Old 05-16-2018, 03:10 PM   #1
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Default Failing Inspections

I thought about this from some of the comments in the Ryan Hilinski thread.

If you were in the military, or a military school, what was something that caused you to fail inspection.

When I was going through Motor T school at Camp Johnson at Camp Lejeune, we always had field day on Thursday night, before inspection on Friday. I never had problems with failing, except for the one room I was in. There were three of us in the room. I was a PFC, as was my other roommate, and we had another roommate who was a Lance Corporal. Despite being the highest ranking man in the room, which he constantly reminded us of that point, he was an absolute moron. He had no clue what to do, so we would get his keys from him every week, and lock him out of the room, so we could clean without him screwing it up. In our room there was a bulletin board. On that board, he had an article about General Gray, the Commandant of the Marine Corps. Someone had drawn a goatee on the Commandant, and we had advised our roommate to take it down. He said he didn't do it, and it wasn't going to be a problem, and refused to remove it. Needless to say, we failed inspection, and had our weekend liberty postponed while we sat in the company commander's office waiting for our discipline. We about beat the crap out of him for not listening. They finally let us go later that night, after screwing around with us.
After that, we refused to listen to him about anything, and continued to lock him out. One week, he kept his guard up, so we couldn't get his keys, and he told us he was going to clean the head. He went down to the supply closet, and came back with a gallon of bleach, and a gallon of ammonia. We tried to explain that he would make toxic gas by combining the two, but he wouldn't believe us. So, we told him to close the door, so we didn't have to smell it. Sure enough, a few minutes later, he starts coughing and gagging, and then comes crawling out, and dragging himself outside. We let it air out, and forbade him from ever doing any cleaning in the room again.

What kind of stories do you have?
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Old 05-16-2018, 03:19 PM   #2
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Default Re: Failing Inspections

Quote:
Originally Posted by CockyandProud View Post
I thought about this from some of the comments in the Ryan Hilinski thread.

If you were in the military, or a military school, what was something that caused you to fail inspection.

When I was going through Motor T school at Camp Johnson at Camp Lejeune, we always had field day on Thursday night, before inspection on Friday. I never had problems with failing, except for the one room I was in. There were three of us in the room. I was a PFC, as was my other roommate, and we had another roommate who was a Lance Corporal. Despite being the highest ranking man in the room, which he constantly reminded us of that point, he was an absolute moron. He had no clue what to do, so we would get his keys from him every week, and lock him out of the room, so we could clean without him screwing it up. In our room there was a bulletin board. On that board, he had an article about General Gray, the Commandant of the Marine Corps. Someone had drawn a goatee on the Commandant, and we had advised our roommate to take it down. He said he didn't do it, and it wasn't going to be a problem, and refused to remove it. Needless to say, we failed inspection, and had our weekend liberty postponed while we sat in the company commander's office waiting for our discipline. We about beat the crap out of him for not listening. They finally let us go later that night, after screwing around with us.
After that, we refused to listen to him about anything, and continued to lock him out. One week, he kept his guard up, so we couldn't get his keys, and he told us he was going to clean the head. He went down to the supply closet, and came back with a gallon of bleach, and a gallon of ammonia. We tried to explain that he would make toxic gas by combining the two, but he wouldn't believe us. So, we told him to close the door, so we didn't have to smell it. Sure enough, a few minutes later, he starts coughing and gagging, and then comes crawling out, and dragging himself outside. We let it air out, and forbade him from ever doing any cleaning in the room again.

What kind of stories do you have?
I actually got a DRB in Corpschool for failing rooms and it was totally B.S.

The first room inspection I failed was because we had literally checked in the night before and were in the middle of going around getting all the paper work signed and had left stuff out, and didn't know that they were doing inspections the following day. Then I got dinged on the day we moved out, same reason even though this time we had left a note explaining we were transferring that afternoon. We had scored perfect or close to it in every other inspection.

The third fail was because I got moved to a room with a total shit-bird who was on his 2nd consecutive 30 day restriction sentence (was caught smoking spice while on restriction for smoking spice) and was getting processed out and absolutely gave 0 shits. I had to go stand in dress blues in front of like 5 chiefs while they yelled and screamed and asked my what happened and why I was such a slob bla bla bla. When I stood for re-inspection (0700 Saturday Morning) and saw how bad he was they totally changed their tune, and actually expedited my off base request chit. I guess it worked out in the end.

Boot camp was the worst for finding b.s. infractions, like dust inside the ac duct cover.
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Old 05-16-2018, 04:14 PM   #3
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Default Re: Failing Inspections

While I forget the year it happened (the incident didn't happen to me, but in my company), I distinctly remember this. There were 4 man alcove rooms at the Citadel and they generally sucked if you had 4 guys in them. Once in a while, with a small Sr class two guys would move into a big room and it was like a palace. Well, since they sucked so bad they moved four freshmen into one, which didn't normally happen.

Anyway we were having a Saturday Morning inspection and the Assistant Commandant , who's real name was Lt. Col. Dick (you can't make that up) was going around with the Company and Battalion commanders. Our rooms at the time had drop ceilings and folks would occasionally hide contraband up there. Well the 1st Sgt or Sgt Major (I can't remember which) pulled out the transom stick and started to probe the ceiling tiles (to no doubt impress Col Dick). About the 2nd or 3rd tile he hit, about two dozen beer cans fell out of the ceiling on to the floor (we were a dry campus). The story that was told to me was freshman in the room turned white as ghosts.

There was an awkward moment as everyone tired to figure out what was going on. The astute Col noticed that the cans were quite dusty and asked the Company commander, "Son, who the hell was in this room last year?" After naming the two Sr. Cadets, the Col went on a profanity laced tirade about how he knew those guys were SOB's and sneaking alcohol onto campus and he could never catch them. I think the good Col tracked the guys down and wrote them a letter on how the got one over on him and were lucky they didn't get caught.

Ltc Dick makes an appearance in this video at around the 3 min mark. He was as tough as nails, but soft as a teddy bear if a cadet truly needed his help.

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Old 05-16-2018, 10:23 PM   #4
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Default Re: Failing Inspections

I was attending Basic NCO school at Ft Lee, Va. The Sgt Major in charge of the school was notorious for inspecting rooms and finding any infraction in the published SOP was grounds for getting put on his "school of the soldier" list which meant doing stupid shit for half a day on Saturday which was usually a day off.

So I'm standing inspection one morning as he's going through the room with his ruler measuring everything and checking everything. He couldn't find anything and my room mate and I exchanged quick glances thinking we might actually pass this thing.

The Sgt Major goes into the shared bathroom (with 2 other NCOs, the rooms were like the letter H with the horizonal part of the H the shared bathroom) and can't find anything wrong in there either. We were standing at parade rest just outside the bathroom looking in while the Sgt Major stepped into the shower, removed his leatherman from it's pouch and proceeded to unscrew the drain cover from the shower floor. Oh shit!

He removes it from the shower floor, turns it over and after discovering the small amount of green algae/mold on the underside declares.............I'll see you gentlemen on Saturday as he briskly walked out with a smile on his face.
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Old 05-16-2018, 10:51 PM   #5
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Default Re: Failing Inspections

Quote:
Originally Posted by Lonnie View Post
While I forget the year it happened (the incident didn't happen to me, but in my company), I distinctly remember this. There were 4 man alcove rooms at the Citadel and they generally sucked if you had 4 guys in them. Once in a while, with a small Sr class two guys would move into a big room and it was like a palace. Well, since they sucked so bad they moved four freshmen into one, which didn't normally happen.

Anyway we were having a Saturday Morning inspection and the Assistant Commandant , who's real name was Lt. Col. Dick (you can't make that up) was going around with the Company and Battalion commanders. Our rooms at the time had drop ceilings and folks would occasionally hide contraband up there. Well the 1st Sgt or Sgt Major (I can't remember which) pulled out the transom stick and started to probe the ceiling tiles (to no doubt impress Col Dick). About the 2nd or 3rd tile he hit, about two dozen beer cans fell out of the ceiling on to the floor (we were a dry campus). The story that was told to me was freshman in the room turned white as ghosts.

There was an awkward moment as everyone tired to figure out what was going on. The astute Col noticed that the cans were quite dusty and asked the Company commander, "Son, who the hell was in this room last year?" After naming the two Sr. Cadets, the Col went on a profanity laced tirade about how he knew those guys were SOB's and sneaking alcohol onto campus and he could never catch them. I think the good Col tracked the guys down and wrote them a letter on how the got one over on him and were lucky they didn't get caught.

Ltc Dick makes an appearance in this video at around the 3 min mark. He was as tough as nails, but soft as a teddy bear if a cadet truly needed his help.

There was a guy in my platoon who had 2 ferrets in cages stored in the drop ceiling in his room. Somehow, he never got caught.
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Old 05-16-2018, 11:19 PM   #6
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Default Re: Failing Inspections

This came to mind... Everybody that served knows someone like this.


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Last edited by carolina_corpsman; 05-18-2018 at 10:17 AM..
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Old 05-17-2018, 12:56 AM   #7
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Default Re: Failing Inspections

When I was a LCpl I slept on the floor weeknights and kept my rack made with shirt stays holding it tight underneath. I lint brushed and ironed that bad boy, too. What a goober.
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Old 05-17-2018, 07:17 AM   #8
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Default Re: Failing Inspections

Thanks to those in this thread that served. I appreciate your service
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Old 05-17-2018, 08:52 AM   #9
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Default Re: Failing Inspections

Back in PLDC (I think it's called BLC now. Basic NCO course for everyone else.), we were to be on the parade field in formation, singing the Army song at 0400. Once PT was over, it was back to the barracks to clean up, get changed, and make the barracks ready for inspection. On our first day of doing this, we had already come up with a plan of action. Duties were split into latrine, trash, the bay, windows, outside, and then a detail who checked for missed and miscellaneous things.

Anyways day one, we are off to a great start. Nobody lagged behind, and everyone got changed quickly and started their cleaning assignments.

At least we thought it was a great start.

In an effort to try to streamline the whole process, everyone of us simply forgot to notice that our barracks had these big windows that overlooked the rest of the training area. The instructors did not fail to notice, of course and we got a thorough ass chewing for changing in front of the windows with our "balls swinging all over the place!"

So that was the running gag for the remainder of the course. Every time somebody in the bay started to change clothes, it was guaranteed that somebody else would start hollering about balls.
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Old 05-18-2018, 09:48 AM   #10
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Default Re: Failing Inspections

Quote:
Originally Posted by Gaichon View Post
When I was a LCpl I slept on the floor weeknights and kept my rack made with shirt stays holding it tight underneath. I lint brushed and ironed that bad boy, too. What a goober.
Yeah, we slept on the floor at BNCO as well. The bed had to be made up a different way each day and it was easier to just make it up the night before and sleep on the floor.
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Old 05-18-2018, 10:56 AM   #11
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Default Re: Failing Inspections

Showed up on the bridge for my OD duties without any slacks on. No problem though, one of my enlisted informed me of my lack of clothing so I went back to my quarters and suited up. Grenada 1983.
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Old 05-18-2018, 08:24 PM   #12
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Default Re: Failing Inspections

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Showed up on the bridge for my OD duties without any slacks on. No problem though, one of my enlisted informed me of my lack of clothing so I went back to my quarters and suited up. Grenada 1983.

Sleepy? Drunk?
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